Disclaimer ***The title of this blog post is meant to be sung with joy to the tune of Jingle bells. I know, I'm silly *****


Do the holidays leave you tired and drained?? Of energy and resources and patience? You may be experiencing a heightened time of people pleasing. There is so much pressure to buy just the right gift, make it to all the relatives house, cook the meals, throw the parties...etc. So, even if you are normally someone who can handle and hold boundaries pretty well, at the holidays you may find yourself crumbling.

The holidays can be a time of increased obligation. Feeling as if we must say “yes” when actually, with the time change, shortened days, and cold weather, we are really wanting to say “no”. Feeling as if we must push through and commit to things when we would rather be at home with a book. Below are some tips and ideas for how to take care of yourself during the holidays:


  1. Remember the true meaning of your holiday. Is it about a celebration of a miracle? Being generous? Or reflecting on the year past? No matter what holiday you celebrate this time of year, gather some information about what it means to you and stay connected to that.

  2. Practice saying “No”. “No is a complete sentence. It’s more loving to show up to things whole heartedly and with bells on than out of obligation.

  3. Set intentions. When you christmas shop, when you eat an indulgent meal, when you have a christmas cocktail, set an intention around the experience you would like to have and stick to it.

  4. Practice gratitude. For some reason, this time of year, I find myself focused on lack more than other times of the year. This can create shame and guilt around when I cannot provide for my loved ones. I find that gratitude is the ultimate antidote.

  5. Your only obligation is to yourself. Your job is to do what nourishes you so that you can be present and your best self for your family, partner, job, and friends. Take care of yourself. It’s a full time job.


I am sending you all love and light this holiday season.

***Disclaimer: This blog post is solely the opinion of the author. It is not a substitute for mental health services nor does it constitute a professional relationship. If you are seeking mental health services, please contact a therapist in your area. If you are experiencing an emergency, please dial 911